TO: Donald John Trump
FROM: Roy Marcus Cohn, Esq, (disbarred)
SUBJECT: ’Sup, Bro?
Ask not, dear Don, “Where's my Roy Cohn?”
I'm dead, Don, cozy in hell.
But remember, I SCHOOLED YOU WELL!
Teaching you to lie and complain?
Shit reprised sounds somehow true?
So says Doc Goebbels — one of the noble-est
thinkers the world ever knew.
Back in the day he'd have me done away with.
In hell today, guess who I stay with?
We agree globally. Blood brothers are we!
We're working together —
birds ... feathers ... whatever —
improving the hell out of Hades.
Greatest hell ever, hell bent for weather,
upgrading it for us sadists.
But we need a hero.
Caligula? Nero?
(Guy here is strictly third rate.)
Unsavory behavior
without ever wavering
suggests you're our savior.
You're great!
Satan without
a detectable defect.
Demonically speaking,
impurely perfect.
A rotund boll weevil,
best-in-class evil.
Light on your feet.
(For your weight.)
On the attack? SS Waffen black?
Trimmed with fool's gold?
Enthralling!
Playing the crowd? Incredibly loud?
Soul long gone, sold?
It's your calling!
Your persecution
demands retribution.
Unfair, unfair. So unfair.
Forget Constitution.
Commence executions.
The storm is coming
DOC AND I WILL BE THERE!
Whoever you say treated you nasty,
we'll punish swiftly. Bigly and vastly.
Dear Don, come down.
Dear Don, come home.
Dear Don, come claim
your crown and your throne.
Hell's bells, dear Don.
Dis donc, dear Don,
ding-dong, dear Don,
dear Don.
Love,
Roy
P.S. On a personal note:
What's his name — Vance?
I was just wondering,
what's in his pants?
🖤
R.M.C.
P.P.S.
Invoice to follow under separate cover.
R. Esq.
